One Another Passages

Lesson 20 June 5, 2022

Role Play

Introduction: We are going to role play two different situations where one of two people has an issue and the

second person is going to come alongside to work them through it. We will especially be concerned with using

any of the One another passages we have been dealing with over these last several weeks.

In the first role play, we will be observing and I will ask for input from all of you at the end.

In the second role play, I will be role playing along with one of our members. It will not be a strict role play in

that I will be asking for your input during the role play.

Before we begin, I want us to look briefly at one short part of James 1:19: “Be quick to hear, slow to speak, and

slow to anger.”

“Quick” means to “make haste”. It can also be translated to “impel forward.” “Slow” means to “delay.”

So James is saying, “Be ready to move quickly toward every opportunity to listen (same Greek word as “hear”).

At the same time, put speaking and anger on pause.” Why do you think James included speaking with anger?

When you are angry, you don’t listen, you only speak.

Note to myself:

Always begin with respect.

Don’t minimize the potential problem.

Don’t patronize.

Linda and carol

The issue is around the recent death of a woman’s husband. They had been married for many years.

Jerry and Ron

The issue is prefaced with a compliment both to Bud and me for our teaching. Then the person will launch

into judgmental statements toward many members of the class.

Ok, class. He has put me in a bind. How do you think I should handle this?

Back with Jerry:

Thank you for your encouragement. I really appreciate your comments on the teaching.

When it comes to this problem, I’d like to know more. Are we talking about just a few people, several, or most

of the group?

You’ve been attending this church for about ten years. Is this problem more recent or long standing?

When are you most aware of the problem?

So, if I understand you, you are saying that several people were not taking the lessons to heart.

How did you come to that conclusion?

I’m wondering how you would apply any of the One Another passages we’ve been studying to this situation?

What are you wrestling with the most? In other words, how does this affect you most?

How does you’re feeling toward…affect the way you relate to them?

Does thinking about these things increase your sense of God’s presence or decrease it?

What do you think God sees in this person? Have you ever asked God what He sees in them?

When Paul tells us to care for One Another, what kinds of things come to mind that you can do?

At this point I did not have time to go into what you see next. I planned to use it if there was time enough.

Class: Here is where I naturally want to go. I think it is too harsh. I’m going to read it. Tell me what you all

think. How would you change it?

When there is a difference between us and anyone else, the question I want to ask is this: Is this a biblical

doctrine we’re talking about or our opinion?

I think one of the best examples of where it is an opinion is in romans 14. Do you remember studying that

passage?

Paul states that both sides were being critical of the other. They each thought they had the moral high

ground. Paul never tells the sides their position is wrong. His solution to the problem is this: Don’t judge one

another any longer. Who are you to judge the servant of another? In other words, stop trying to play God.

Because that’s what you are doing.

Some things must be condemned. For example, the deeds of the flesh mentioned by Paul in Gal. 5:19-21 or

any violation of one of God’s commands.

But we must be careful that in our zeal for what is right, we don’t assume our position is right if there is not a

clear biblical teaching.

We must be careful not to assume a self-righteous attitude. We always have to acknowledge or own sin and

how that can color the way we perceive things.

Disagreements can turn into character assassination.

It’s so easy to become judgmental of those whose opinions are different from ours. And that’s what the

Romans were doing.

Here are some potential passages to explore together:

Build up One Another. Rom. 14:19.

Be devoted to and give preference to One Another. Rom. 12:10.

Accept One Another as Christ has accepted us. Rom. 15:7.

Forgive One Another as God in Christ has forgiven us. Eph. 4:32.

With humility of mind, consider One Another more important than yourself. Don’t just look out for your own

interests. Phil. 2:3-4

Bear (or put up) with One Another. Col. 3:13.

Encourage One Another 1 Thess. 5:11

Be hospitable to One Another. 1 Pet. 4:9 . What is hospitality?

Have the same mind toward One Another, not feeling superior to others. Rom. 12:16.

Members of the body should care for One Another. 1 Cor. 12:25. How could you care for this person?

Since we are members of One Another Rom. 12:5, what responsibilities do we have? What should you do?

What responsibility do you have toward them?

I had planned potentially to use some of these passages. There was not time.

The following is the summary of speaking awareness and listening methods I gave to the role players to help in

the procedure:

Five Awareness Areas of Speaking

1) Sensory data

Sight—Context: Who and what. Time: When. Space: Where. Body language.

Sound—Background noise. Speaking pace—fast or slow. Tone: Volume, pitch clarity.

Touch—Hard/soft. Hot/cold. Rigid/flexible. Smooth/scratchy.

Taste—Sweet, sour, salty, bitter.

Smell—Floral, citrus, fruit, wood, nut, pungent, sweet, mint, decay. Memory evoking.

2) Thoughts

Beliefs—What each person brings from past experience.

Interpretations—What meaning you place on your thoughts.

Expectations—What you think will happen. Most of us hear and see what we expect.

3) Feelings

Here is a short list of negative feelings:

Afraid, angry, anxious, bewildered, concerned, confused, disappointed, envious, frustrated, guilty, hostile, hurt,

ignored, incompetent, indecisive, inferior, insecure, jealous, lonely, manipulated, misunderstood, stubborn,

threatened, unappreciated.

Choose 3 or 4 for your issue in the role play. Add positive feelings as you go.

4) Wants

For yourself—Who you want to be. What you want to do. What you want to have (material).

For someone else—The same areas.

For your community (faith or otherwise)—What do you want your community to look like.

5) Actions

Past—What you have done.

Present—What is currently happening.

Future—What you will do.

Five Points of Listening

1) Attend—Pay close attention. Listen with you eyes as well as your ears.

2) Acknowledge with statements like:

I understand that.

I can see you are concerned.

That must have been difficult.

3) Invite more information: Can you tell me more? How did you feel about that?

4) Summarize: If I heard you correctly, you are saying…..Then let them correct you.

5) Ask Open Questions: Who, what, when, where, how.

Be careful of why questions. Some times they can be accusations: Why did you do that?

James 1:19 “Be swift to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger.”

Presence—Be fully present. Pay attention. Attune yourself to what you are hearing. Think about what would you feel

in their place.

Resonance—Experience along with them what they are feeling. Mirror them.

“The way we pay attention, wires our brains in certain patterns. The way we pay attention to others, influences the

wiring of their brains.” Thompson

Here is a handout listing most of the One Another passages we studied:

One another Passages in the New Testament

Love

Love associated with “one another” occurs fourteen times in the N. T. four are in the Gospel of John, all during the last

supper. Three are commands, one is a statement. Five occur in 1 John and one in 2 John. Three occur in Paul’s letters.

One occurs in 1 Peter. Here they are in that order:

Jn. 13:34 A new command I give you. Love one another as I have loved you.

Jn. 15:12 This is my command: Love one another as I have loved you.

Jn. 15:17 This I command you that you love one another.

Jn. 13:35 By this all men will know you are my disciples, if you love one another.

1 Jn. 3:11 This is the message you heard from the beginning that we should love one another.

1 Jn. 3:23 This is his commandment that we believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and love one another as

he has commanded us.

1 Jn. 4:7 Let us love one another for love is from God and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.

1 Jn. 4:11 If God so loved us, we ought to love one another.

1 Jn. 4:12 If we love one another, God lives in us and his love is perfected in us.

2 Jn. 1:5 It’s not as if I’m writing to you a new commandment, but one which we’ve had from the beginning. That

we love one another.

Rom. 13:8 Owe nothing to anyone but to love one another, for he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law.

1 Thess. 3:12 Increase and abound in love for one another, and for all men just as we do for you.

2 Thess. 1:3 Your faith is greatly enlarged and the love of one another of you toward one another grows ever

greater.

1 Pet. 1:22 Without pretense or acting, fervently love one another from the heart.

Service

Jn. 13:14 Do you know what I have done to you? If I, the Lord and teacher washed your feet, you also ought to

wash the feet of one another.

Rom. 14:19 Let us pursue what leads to peace and building up one another.

Gal. 6:2 Bear the burdens of one another and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Rom. 15:14 I am convinced you are able to admonish one another.

Col. 3:16 Let the word of Christ richly dwell in you with all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another.

1 Thess. 5:11 Encourage one another and build up one another just as you have been doing.

1 Thess. 4:18 Comfort one another with these words (about meeting Christ in the air).

Heb. 10:24 Let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds.

Jas. 5:16 Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed.

1 Pet. 4:9 Be hospitable to one another without complaint.

Attitude

Rom. 12:10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor.

Rom. 12:16 Be of the same mind toward one another, not haughty in mind but associate with the lowly.

Rom. 15:5 May God grant you to be of the same mind with one another according to Christ Jesus.

Rom. 15:7 Accept one another as Christ has accepted us to the glory of God.

Mk. 9:50 Be at peace with one another.

Eph. 4:2 With humility and gentleness, forgiving one another.

Eph. 4:32 Be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving as God in Christ has also forgiven us.

Eph. 5:21 Be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.

Phil. 2:3 With humility of mind, consider one another more important than yourself.

Col. 3:13 Bear with one another and forgive one another.

1 Thess. 5:15 See that no one repays evil for evil, but seek after what is good for one another and for all men.

1 Pet. 5:5 Clothe yourself with humility toward one another.

1 Jn. 1:7 If we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another and the blood of Christ,

his Son, cleanses us from all sin.

Negatives

Rom. 14:13 Let us not judge one another.

Col. 3:9 Don’t lie to one another.

Jas. 5:9 Don’t complain against one another.

Jas. 4:11 Don’t speak against one another.

Gal. 5:26 If we live in the Spirit, let us walk by the Spirit. Let us not become boastful, challenging one another or

envying one another.

Gal. 5:15 If you bite and devour one another, take care lest you be consumed by one another.

Positive Speaking

Eph. 4:25 Laying aside all falsehood, speak the truth to one another.

The Body

Rom. 12:5 We who are many are one body in Christ individually members of one another.

1 Cor. 12:25 Members of the body should have the same care for one another.

1 Pet. 4:10 Use your gifts in serving each other as good stewards of the grace of God.

Heb. 10:25 Let us not forsake the assembling together with yourselves.

1 Pet. 4:8 Keep fervent in your love among yourselves.

The following is another handout listing the same passages, however, in the order that they occur in the New

Testament:

One Another Passages in order of Appearance in the New Testament

When the same verse appears twice, there are two One Another’s in the verse. This occurs five times in the New

Testament. We covered most of these passages. We skipped a few and did not list the “Greet one another with a holy

kiss” passage.

Mark 9:50

John 13:14, 34, 35; 15:12, 17. Five

Rom. 12:5, 10, 10, 16; 13:8; 14:13, 19; 15:5, 7, 14. Ten

1 Cor. 12:25. One

Gal. 5:15, 15, 26, 26; 6:2. Five

Eph. 4:2, 25, 32; 5:21. Four

Phil. 2:3. One

Col. 3:9, 13, 13. Three

1 Thess. 3:12; 4:9, 18; 5:11, 11, 15. Six

2 Thess. 1:3 One

Heb. 10:24, 25. Two

James 4:11; 5:9, 16, 16. Four

1 Pet. 1:22; 4:9, 10; 5:5. Four

1 John 1:7; 3:11, 23; 4:7, 11, 12. Six

2 John 1:5 One

If you did not get the chance to provide us with some feedback, but would like to, fill out the next page and

turn it In to the church or at the next Sunday School class. Thanks.

Feed Back

In our class, Bud’s primary goal was to deliver the big picture and tie things together. Mine was to add significant

details. Please fill out any of these questions you would like to and return them back in class next week or to the church

office. It’s been a privilege to work with all of you.

What did you think of the format of the co-taught lessons?

What did we do that you’d like to see more of?

What would you like to see us do that we did not do?

What thing would you most like to see emphasized?

At the end of the study, what do you think is the importance of the One Another passages?

How do they fit together?

How would you apply them to our fellowship?

Do you have other suggestions of how it might be done differently?